Top 5 Music Countdown: What Do True Blood Vampires Listen To?

Bloodsuckers and music heads, UNITE! Pop culture is teeming with vampires right now so what better time to ride this modern day wave and countdown the top 5 bands the evil undead rock out to!

5. Old skool, quintessential vamps like Dracula and Nosferatu and other stiff upper-lippy noble creatures of the night would most certainly listen to something classical or baroque, but since YouTube lacks any legit Mozart music videos, I thought I’d introduce the next best thing: aristocratic white boy rappers, Lord T and Eloise!

Lord T

4. Anne Rice vamps like Lestat and Armand would no doubt appreciate a fine symphony, but would irrefutably geek out to something sexy and Gothic like “Bullet with Butterfly Wings” by one of my all-time favorite bands, Smashing Pumpkins!

the-smashing-pumpkins-2

3. Modern superhero-type vampires from films like Underworld and Blade, you know, the ones who wear tight synthetic bodysuits and use new”fang”led weaponry (see what I did there?) would listen to A Perfect Circle, naturally! That Maynard Keenan is one brooding mo-fo!

Picture 1

2. The beloved Cullens (Edward, Alice, Carlisle) from the Twilight series and the Buffy the Vampire Slayer evil dead (you’re the man, Spike!) suffer from that pesky teen angst. So, it’s gotta be without a doubt something dark and tweeny like “Fighter” by Christina Aguilera!

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1. And finally, saving the best for last, the southern-style bloodsucking sex-pots of True Blood — the hottest, most scandalous vampire series out now — would unquestionably listen to the sultry, twangy tunes of Neko Case!

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Alright vampire lovers, it’s about time you buy your dream domain IWantAHotVampireToSuckMyBlood.com for the bargain price of 7.49!!! Just go to GoDaddy.com and use my code TOP7 and get a pretty new website you can call your own and make me (Heather) happy at the same time! Or, if you just wanna get 10% off any non-discounted order, enter the code TOP5! For orders of 30 bucks or more, get $5 off by using the code TOP6!! I’ve got your back… and neck in this case!

Or if you’re not really an internet geek but more of a sneaker pimp, go to Eastbay.com to get awesome discounts on new kicks and sporting gear! Just use my code Aftop515 to get 15% off any order or Aftop520 to get 20% off any order of $75 or more!

Now, go hang some garlic on your bedroom window and whittle a wooden stake to hide under your pillow. SWEET DREAMS!

Your Devoted Music Friend,
Heather

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~ by Heather Frank on September 18, 2009.

One Response to “Top 5 Music Countdown: What Do True Blood Vampires Listen To?”

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